I want my passport back! 

Am still stuck in Malaysia but I'm sorry to those people who I've snapped at, but you just don't know how high the level of stress goes up to whenever people ask me about my visa situation. I'm not even going to attempt to justify myself - this is just going to be one of those unrepentant things I hold on to (among many things).

It has come to a point where I refuse to meet people except for a select few to lessen the chances of anyone asking me about my visa and cause my blood pressure to go up. I'm so grateful for the few who understand me well enough to give me the time and space I need, especially for the sms that said, "If you need to go out for a drink or dinner, just call, the doors are always open." Nothing more, nothing less. Bless you my friend!

Anyway, among the build up to my frustration has been the topic of prayer. It's been something I've been consciously and unconsciously trying to understand better in the last 5 years. Why pray if God already knows everything and plans out everything and if I don't know what's best for me when He does? Well, I really really want to go back to London, and Matthew 7:7 - Ask and it will be given to you.

So why when I've asked, I still have not received?

Bro O asked me about my situation today as it'll involve his and his wife's situation as well, I told him, "I understand prayer less today than I did 10 years ago."

You don't know how glad I am when my spiritual mentor responded saying, "ME TOO!!"

No wonder I'm as confused as I am eh.
so writes ee @ 12:28 AM

i know how you feel because i've been in similar--not identical, but similar--situations myself. don't give up. keep up praying and keep on believing that god has your best at heart. acknowledge his sovereignty AND keep asking until his answer is clear.

pray as hard as david did for his dying child. but after his child died, david did not turn away from god. this isn't an answer about the nature of prayer or god's will. this is an example of how one can pray. i will be praying with you.

Posted by Anonymous Anonymous | 3:50 AM  

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