Journey mercies

But if that was the only reason I had to go to UK, then it meant that all the other reasons to remain in Malaysia meant the exact opposite, that no matter how many different reasons I could come up with, they were all the same - that I did not trust God.

So I chose to jump.

And you know what, I'm glad He proved that it's never a mistake to trust Him. A number of months after I came, the manager who offered me the different position in the company left the company! If I had taken up his offer based on the circumstances which was dependent on his continuing presence in the company, I would have been left in a pretty shitty position to put it mildly.

And I would have missed out on the amazing experience I've had since coming over. And He continues to spring new twists and turns in this soap opera of mine. I suspect He will take me to places I never expected, encounter amazing things that will bring me great joy, but also immense things that could bring me great pain and sorrow. But in all of it, there will always be a reason for me to lift my voice and declare His glory forever and ever.

Amen to that.

... is my office guard.

Every morning, he tells me what my health is like.


Monday

Guard: You don't look well...


Tuesday

Guard: You look ok today...


Wednesday

Guard: You look a bit better. Monday you looked worse.


Thursday

Guard: You look very strong today! Much better!


Friday

Guard: You ok? You look ok...

I'm in a melancholic mood.

So many changes, so many thoughts running through my mind. If I said that my life at times resembles a soap opera, I would not be kidding!

If my life was truly a soap opera, in this very moment, the scene would be as such that I stood in the middle of a flurry of flashbacks of events, of people, of conversations, of private moments. And as the collection of sight and sounds swirl around me, I would reach out to try to touch them, or perhaps to try to catch hold of them to keep them from disappearing out of reach but my hand would only find it groping air.

Some of the swirling faces causes joy to leap in my heart, some, gratitude. Some, sadness. Some, regret. One that makes me long to reach out to grab, but a whisper of patience holds me back. Another makes me hold out my hand midway but then drops back down to yield. To what do I yield to? I don't know.

As each panoramic memory swirls, I realise, I really don't know.

As each panoramic memory fades and leaves the vista I stand on unclouded, only one thing remains and the only thing I refuse to yield my grasp on. It is the cross of my salvation.

Every first Sunday of the month we have church family lunch together. And a typical English meal would consist of the main course and desserts. To the English, they call desserts "pudding".

During the church family lunch 2 months ago, as everyone moved on to their puddings, I noticed Pam walking into the church hall holding only a piece of orange. She looked deep in thought, and she finally shook her head slightly, obviously changed her mind about the orange, and placed the orange into her handbag.

I was walking towards her and the timing was such that as she placed the orange in her bag, I was in between her and a group of young people.

And with a loud voice I said in a mock indignant and shocked voice...


Me: Pam!! Are you stealing that orange!?!

Pam: No, as a matter of fact, I wasn't! You see, I took the orange thinking that I would have it, but decided against it and thought since I brought it all the way here, I might as well take it home with me to have it later.


At this point I'm grinning at her in my most cheekiest grin as the other young people around started laughing. Pam quickly recovered from my cheeky outburst and gave me her amused half-smile. Trust me, she loves me more for my absurd cheekiness!

If I was living in Asia, no, I probably wouldn't be as cheeky as that to an elder. Especially not with the Asian culture of 'saving face'. But I think even by English standards, that was probably a little bold of me to pipe up like that. But the words came out of my mouth before I even realised what I was going to say.

So sometimes, it is good that I don't think before I speak! And only with Pam!

This is Pam. I kid you not, she is an incredible person.

She is 80++ years of age, lives alone though she has many friends and family, revs her car like she's a rally racer, will be more than happy to enter a verbal spar with anyone and probably will win with her sharp wit and quick comebacks.

She is also part of a choir group that puts up a performance every month. And every month, she goes around to people from the church persuading them to buy a ticket to attend the concert. Persuading is a nice word. I think most people would use coerce, or rather, emotionally blackmail people to attend.

It's a regular joke about how she's the most feared woman in church because if she thinks that a person has a remotely small chance to be convinced to go for her concert, she would hound the person and pester them until they give in because no one likes to say no to an elderly lady, something everyone knows she takes advantage of.

Ever since I joined the church, and innocently obliged to go to her concert the first time, she has since stopped asking me if I was available to attend her concert.

No, she simply comes up to me, shoves a ticket into my hand and the weekend before the concert, reminds me that I owe her money for it. What man, got conned by an 80++ year old lady. How I know they can be as cunning as that.

But hehe, I don't really mind. I adore this lady, and I now look forward to her concerts so I can go and support her. She rewards everyone who goes by bringing them back to her house for refreshments anyway, and entertains everyone with her stories of old, or a show of her slagging off someone.

There's a rumour, which she discredits but because of how absurdly veracious it is of her character that its hard for anyone to disbelieve it, that the choir singers have a competition each time to see who sells the most tickets among themselves and Pam wins each time hands down. She was a geography teacher a long time ago, but everyone says it's a shame she was never in sales.

I am also quite attached to her because during the more difficult times of uncertainties, she used to come up to me every time she saw me, asking me how things were and asking what she could specifically pray for me for. Because of her wit and quick tongue, she is also the one person who sets me off laughing the most.

She raised 8 kids with an equally remarkable man, so those who met him before he passed away told me. Her husband was a dentist who gave free dental service to all missionaries who returned to the UK.

I had a meal with her and a few others from church during New Year's eve last year, and she told us the story about how she had to have a surgery to remove a cancerous lump growing on her foot. The surgeon asked if she would like to be under anesthetics or just had it applied around her foot. She asked for the latter. The surgeon then asked her if she would like to look elsewhere as he removed the cancerous spot out of her foot and she went no, she wanted very much to watch the entire process. And was very fascinated as she watched the flesh being removed and kept asking him questions. That's just an example of how incredibly formidable a character she is.

Last Sunday, after Pam once again gave me a ticket to her choir without even asking if I was going, I went to talk to Martin and Sarah. I explained to Sarah about the choir and Pam as she was new to the church. And because she looked interested, I asked if she wanted to go and she said yes.

Then Martin was saying about how he can't go this time, but was a little apprehensive about how to tell Pam. Then his eyes shone as he asked me whether it would work if he told Pam that he found Sarah as a replacement for him. Shortly after that he went to find Pam and I went to kay poh for the fun of it.


Martin: Pam, I can't go for your choir this month because... *launches into a detailed explanation why*

At this point, the corner of Pam's mouth lifts into a small smile as she allowed Martin to nervously explain to her why he couldn't go, which sets me off into a fit of giggle. It was so funny to see Martin squirm.

Pam: Why Martin *she says in a konon-nya innocent tone*, I must pray for you that you can finish your work beforehand so you can come then!

Martin: Err... err... no, but... *launches into another 5 minute explanation* And, and, what I did is, I asked Sarah to go along for the choir in my place!

I was still giggling behind Martin and he occasionally turned to shoot me a dirty look.

Pam: *Suddenly turning to me* By the way, did you ask JeongSoo to come?

Me: *Immediately shuts up* Err. No?

Pam: What!?! You haven't asked him!?! But I entrusted it to you this morning to ask him!

Me: Err... err... Actually,Martindidn'taskSarahtogoforyourconcert,Idid!

Martin: HEY!!!

Me: Whaaaattt... she *points at Pam* put me on the spot!!!


I will miss Pam very much indeed, when the Lord calls her back to be home with Him. She exemplifies "to live is Christ and to die is gain" Philippians 1:21.

So Jono, Martin and I went camping. We borrowed Ali H's 5-man tent, which fit 3 air beds just nicely, so we agreed that it was meant to be a 5-man-cram tent.

We actually set up camp in the backyard of Jono's friend's parents' house on Friday night, splitting the 4 hour journey to Wales over two days. After a 3 course supper that was prepared for us, the three of us settled in the tent and since we all were tired from work we were eager to fall asleep. Ten minutes later, Jono and I shouted in the darkness...


"PARSLEY!!!"


Jono's friend's big black Doberman decided that he wanted to sleep with us to and came barging into the tent. We had to push it back out and zipped up the tent, to which the Doberman sat outside whining for a bit.

After that, I slept beautifully sound, and woke up in the morning to the guys muttering about some stupid bird that kept them awake from 4am onwards and they couldn't believe I slept through it. No, you can't underestimate my abilities to sleep anywhere anytime at all.

On Saturday morning, we went horseback riding in Wales! It was a bit weird when I first got on top of the big horse, but liked it very much. Jono, being a little more experienced, went of on a separate galloping route, while Martin and I stuck with the walking trail. But at one point, it so happened our guide was behind the two of us making sure that the horse was alright or something, and Martin decided to be a little adventurous and kicked his horse into a canter, without knowing that my horse was used to following the lead of the horse in front of it. So without me being prepared for it to move, was caught in surprise with one leg free of the stirrup and trying to hold on to my balance while trying to pull my reins to stop the horse.

The poor guide, who was a student in Cardiff University, was so frightened, because she shouldn't have allowed that to happen because we could have had a bad accident. But it was a good thing that we didn't really go that fast and my horse was only really interested in eating grass and plants than exercising herself.

Later in the afternoon we decided to hike up one of the hills, to which Martin proved himself to be one of the most straightforward guy around. He basically decided that the best way to hike the hill was to go straight up. Literally. Even despite me saying that there seemed to be a proper track going round the hill. No, he said. Straight up, he said. Tempt the wrath of the strong gust of winds, no proper trail to let us know it's perfectly safe, ignore the heart-thumping fear in face of the possibility of the winds blowing you over the steep hill and plunge you to your death, he might as well have said.

Naw, just being drama mama. It was perfectly safe although I did realise that I do have a slight fear of heights after all.

Jono and Martin posing for the camera

To be continued...

Labels: Friends, Travels

I was at the bus stop outside a friend's flat, after having some Jordanian food she cooked specially for me, and I was waiting for the bus to go home. I could see the bus a 100 years away, stopped at the red light, so it was going to be about a minute's wait for me. At the same time, I looked up at the bus sign post and saw a yellow poster stuck over it that said, "This bus stop will not be in operation from 2 June onwards."

-_-

The next bus stop was supposed to be a 100 yards ahead of the bus stop I stood at. I looked over at the other guy who stood there waiting for the same bus and I asked him in a slightly nervous tone whether he thought the bus would stop for us or not. I was gearing myself up to run for the other bus stop at that point.


Guy: Err... I think the bus will stop for us.

Me: Are you sure!?! But what if it doesn't!?!

Guy: I'm pretty sure it will. It should.

Me: Ok, if you're so sure, you wave and make sure it stops...

Guy: Err... you know, I think you should wave...

*Pause*

Me: I think you're right. *Waves hand femininely*

Bus stops.


That's strategic thinking for you.