Journey mercies

The first six months of this year has been very quiet and felt like I disappeared into a molehill.

The second half the year is starting to feel like I'm making up for the first half!

Friends from church mentioned in the first half of not seeing much of me anymore. Still very much the case I'm afraid. So fret not my parents, it's not just you!

My colleague pointed out I've not had a proper break this year (while she's gone on three at least). Last big chunk of time off I had was when sis and mom was around, but even then I was not feeling well before they came and I had a major proposal to work on and cut back on the time off.

This week has been maddeningly busy and I am so glad this weekend I'll be going up to Scotland on a road trip with two friends!!!

Wooo HooOo!

I've got a bad habit though. I hate planning stuff. So I always try to push planning to someone else (I'm off to Hong Kong in September and Eevon's planning it NyaaAaHahaHhhaa). Last year trip to Paris I shoved it to KC. This Scotland trip I made Rizal do it!! See my habit?

So anyway. The only problem is everyone is always just too busy to do it, but I trust Eevon. She's a girl, she's capable and there is a reason why she has to do it.

Whereas for guys. Well. What can I say. KC did a pretty good job.

ONLY because he RECYCLED the itinerary another guy's girlfriend drew up for their trip a month before ours!!! Which worked fine. I'm pretty laid back and don't care too much about having too detailed trips.

Rizal. Well. Don't ever trust an EyeBeeMer to have time.

My other friend asked me last weekend what the plans are, how much does she have to pay, what are we going to do.

I looked at her and blinked. "Get back to you I will," my promise was.

I asked Rizal last night what the plans are, how much does she have to pay, what are we going to do.

He looked at me and blinked. "Err. Hop on...?"

-__-

"By the way Rizal, didn't you say you only booked the hotels for Sat and Sun night? But our plan is to return to London on Wednesday right? What about the other nights?"

"He he... free and easy?" spreads hands out like it's a wonderful surprise.

Blink. Blink.

"OK!"

Mental back up plan... drive to Newcastle and sleep in HuiMin's house if we have to pay exorbitant last minute prices for rooms. I'm bringing my sleeping bag in case. I don't know about the other two. Everyone for themselves. Dog eat dog world.

About a month ago one of the university students who lived in the flat in front of church (my flat is inside the church), and who lived with Shanx2, moved back home to St Albans after graduating.

We held a farewell dinner the night before which Shanx2 cooked (and can't tell you how YuMmmm it was especially her stuffed squid dish). During the afternoon before that, I was wondering what to get him as a farewell present as we actually had a very deep and significant conversation months back.

I got him the Wild at Heart book, which I had heard impacted a lot of my guy friends up in Newcastle that it spurred them on to push the sisters to the side and declare they needed a men only Bible study to build one another up to be the kind of man God made them to be. They pressured the sisters to do the same and they were slightly baffled as to what they needed to address in a women Bible study :)

I was thrilled to hear the initiatives the men were taking. It's not as if the Lord created us as man and woman by the random outcome of a die. And there are so much dangers men specifically face and dangers women themselves specifically face.

Anyway, I read half of the book by the time I got to the farewell party and I must say there were precious insights the book gave me into the man psyche and gave me a better idea how a woman can and should respond to.

Need to get another copy and finish reading it, but a highly recommended read!

I'm helping a friend with her CV. She made me laugh!!!

I went to a Japanese church service this afternoon for the fun of it. I didn't understand a single thing about the sermon but they sang very familiar songs I could sing the English version by heart. I think most of them were very unsure in how to approach me, but I didn't feel put off by it but really felt quite warm and welcomed.

After service, where English services will always have biscuits and tea and coffee, they had a special today... kakigori!

Which is, as a Japanese lady who used to live in Singapore told me, ais kacang!!!!

Went to Penny's and Marie's new place which is less than 5 minutes walk away from mine (yay!). They're the latest Malaysian additions to the church except that Marie hasn't really joined yet because she's working on Sundays.

When Penny first appeared, people were telling me there was a Malaysian scouting the church out and I should meet her, etc etc. And I felt a tinge of female territorism surge up. I wanted to be special! I wanted to be the only Malaysian everyone loves!

But when I finally met Penny, I fell in love with her at first sight.

She was cute as buttons, sweet and cheerful with a golden heart.

They invited me over for dinner 2 weeks ago and fed me Malaysian home cooked food.

So last Monday I had to go for a scheduled eye operation to remove a slight growth on top my bottom eye lid. And because of the mole which I've had since birth, they would use the growth to do a biopsy on it just to make sure there's nothing funky happening with it. Wait for FIVE HOURS to do a 10 MINUTES operations.

When they finally got to me, they blurred my eyes with drops that stung and then they injected the local anesthetics around my eye THREE TIMES and each time was PAINFUL. Then it felt like they took a nailclipper and clipped off the area with the growth.

It was pretty weird, like you could hear it was as if they clipped out a sizeable chunk but you didn't feel a single thing.

I'm a little late in learning the joys of Youtube, but this just means that I have so much more to discover!

I could fall in love with this kind of talent.

When I was in Malaysia, whenever my phone rang and I see his name appear, my heart would groan inwardly.

When I answer the phone and the loud nasal-like voice would ask (some might say shout at) me, "What's happening!?" So loudly I usually have to push the phone away from my ear to adjust to the sudden noise.

"I'm calling you because I felt the Holy Spirit prompt me!!! What mischief are you up to now!?!"

I wonder if yesterday the Holy Spirit was the one who prompted me. I'm sure He did.

I am truly blessed. I've been fully claimed.


For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

Psalm 139:13-16

How is it that everytime I speak with you, your words always hit some part of my heart and spirit?

I've already been feeling like I was running and not feeling as weary as I thought I should be (Isaiah 40:28-31) but doubt and fear sometimes caused a current in the air to shake me. Tonight You remind me yet again of Your hand ever firm on me and my days.

My feet are strengthened again and my steps sure and firm again. I will not be swept aside.

I am in love with this band. I don't know what they're singing about, but most of their songs sound very uplifting.









I love the kids in this video!!!

I've been busy and drained for the last two weeks with deadlines causing me to feel like I'm constantly running to catch a leaving train.

Truth be told it isn't just work that keeps me busy but that'll be a story for another time.

I have been thinking a lot lately and I wonder whether this is just a common human habit to think as much as I do or is it something I do too much of.

I met up with an old friend from college days on Friday night. It must have been 7 years since we last saw each other! I was seriously exhausted on Friday and I could hardly function in the office the whole day, and plus I had a bit of tummy upset from lunch so I felt like I was seriously dragging myself to meet her in central London after work.

But I was very glad to catch up with her. We did get along well enough in college but I was a little surprised on how well we got along on Friday night! She brought the best parts out of me I think, and I was soon chatting, making stupid comments, cracking jokes and being the girl all my best friends love about me the most. Felt like that part of me has been dormant for quite a while as English people don't tend to draw that out of me much.

Being a Penang girl, she even helped me practise my Hokkien! Which I'm glad is still there if just a bit rusty.

Before we parted at the tube station I was telling her in Hokkien a thought that ran through my head before I met her.


Me: Ta ma hor, wa ti kua teh leh ang moh lang eh bat chiu hor, ani sui oh! Oo ani cheh sek. Wa eh peng yu oo chip pai gia pictures of ee lang eh eyes hor, even if it's blue color hor, boh xiang eh! Oo eh xiang oo chui, oo eh xiang ice!

Valyn: Wa lang pun eh ah, contacts lorh. Wa pun oo ah.

Me: Gui mah!

Valyn: Boh gui! Chin pi eh.

Me: Ai lui si gui la! Anyway, so ta ma wa kua te leh ang moh si mm si, I feel jealous. But then... ee lang eh pi ku leh... chin tua.

*Uses my finger to draw a big nose over mine*

Me: Then wa xiao, God is fair.

*Nods head seriously*

Valyn: ... *hangs her head*

Me: Hehehehhe...


Don't understand? Translation below.



Me: Earlier hor, I was looking at the Westerners' eyes hor, very pretty oh! They have so many different colours. My friend once took pictures of their eyes hor, even if it's blue color hor, it can be different eh! Sometimes the blue looks like there's water, sometimes it looks like there's ice!

Valyn: We also can have what, contacts lorh. I have it too.

Me: Expensive mah!

Valyn: Not expensive! Cheap eh.

Me: If it needs money it's expensive la! Anyway, so I was looking at the Westerners, I feel jealous. But then... their nose... is very big.

*Uses my finger to draw a big nose over mine*

Me: Then I was thinking, God is fair.

*Nods head seriously*

Valyn: ... *hangs her head*

Me: Hehehehhe...

I felt like I was in an angry, churning sea. It kept raging to overpower me, waves pounding against me unceasing, unyielding.

And then silence came.

Not because the sea ceased to be. But you can only fight so much and for so long before utter exhaustion claims you. I don't know when my arms stopped fighting the waves to stay afloat or when my eyes closed as the watery depths claimed me fully.

I only knew when deep within the sea, the scream of the gales in the sky was a gentle muffled sound; everything stops to matter as you sink slowly and effortlessly deeper to the darkness of the depths.

Then like someone trying to shake me awake from a deep deep dreamless sleep, I heard in a distance a loud splash in the ocean and a strong and firm hand was trying to pull me from my watery bed.

Annoyed, I tried to swim deeper farther into the sea to escape The Hand, but The Hand was firm and insistent. It kept trying to rouse me and swim up was Its soundless whisper. Not fully awake, memories of deep blue skies; of the brilliant shining sun; of laughter floated around me like a dance of light that wisped away only too soon.

I shut my eyes to it in pain.

But when I opened my eyes again, the warmth of the sun caressed my cheeks. I saw the white sails.

And there was joy.

Have been house-sitting for a couple who are away for a month in US. First night in their house alone and I felt just a little unsettled that I don't hear two kids bickering/singing/shouting in Korean gabble. I quickly got used to the silence though.

Yesterday, I went back to the other flat to get some stuff and was blocked by the 8yo girl who stood in front of the door, demanding where I was going with a slightly hurt look. She really didn't want me to leave.

Took me 5 minutes to shake her off, after I finally promised her I would be back the next evening. As I was walking home after work today, I was tempted to go straight to the couple's house but since I already promised HyeonMin I would be at the flat, I didn't want to get into the habit of breaking promises to kids.

But when I got to the flat, she and her brother were watching The Incredibles and barely gave me 5 seconds of their attention.

-_-

So much for being attached to me.